The Pink Panther(2006) : A Diamond in the Rough

Director : Shawn Levy
Screenplay : Len Blum, and Steve Martin
Cast :  Steve Martin, Jean Reno, Emily Mortimer Henry Czerny, Beyoncé Knowles, Jason Statham (The Dead guy)
Run Time : 93 min

If you haven't watched this movie yet, I am not going to hurl obscenities at you.    I do request, however, that you close this tab, find the movie and watch it before you even consider going over the next few lines.

Classics are, by definition, fantastic, and you could hardly find a better example of this than Peter Seller's classic, "The Pink Panther". Don't panic if you haven't watched it. Most people haven't; they've seen only some snippets and that's okay. The humor is from a different period and you need to be in the right mindset to enjoy it. History tells us that remakes of classics are doomed to fail. Why? Is it because they are so good that you simply cannot compete? Or is it just that we have formed such an impeccable image of the movie in our mind that we are unable to accept that the remake can be anything but miserable. I am of the opinion that the truth is the latter. The "New" Pink Panther has fallen prey to this very idea. If it weren't to be the remake of such a fantastic movie, it would have been considered a comic masterpiece. But alas, such a movie ends up with a lowly rating of 5.3.

Stop browbeating her! Can't you see she is sexy?

The movie opens up with the high profile murder of a Football Coach Yves Gluant (Jason Statham) and the mysterious theft of one of the the world's largest pink diamonds, "The Pink Panther". Chief Inspector Charles Dreyfus (Kevin Kline) looks at this as an opportunity to make his mark as a great detective and assigns the case to the Village Dunce, Inspector Jacques Clouseau (Steve Martin), a man who has supreme confidence in his own abilities but lacks somewhat of a finesse in his execution. Dreyfus needed someone to distract the world press while he and his team pursued the "real" perpetrator. To keep an eye on Clouseau he assigns Detective Gilbert Ponton (Jean Reno) as his partner. Clouseau graciously takes him under his wing as "a simple farm boy who has come to Clouseau to learn". Xania (Beyoncé Knowles) who was the victim's girlfriend is now a suspect but chivalrous that he is, Clouseau refuses to interrogate her in the conventional sense. He instead uses his legendary powers of seduction to poomp her for imformasion. 

He is not 'pushing up the daisies,' he is DEAD !

Armed with the miracle pill for middle aged men, their "date" still ends up as a hot mess. Clouseau continues training his partner with surprise attacks in order to keep his senses sharp. But as it turns out, the farmboy's senses are a little too sharp for him. Nevertheless, as time passes Ponton's respect for the heavily accented frenchman only grows. The investigation continues, failing miserably but with style. Clouseau pulls out every trick in the book, including his own variant of the "Good Cop - Bad Cop routine" where he plays both sides. His investigation leads them to the United States of America where he finds bliss in the disgusting american food, The Hambuuger, no wait.. aambaaga, I mean dambuger. While returning to France though, Clouseau's new found affliction gets him arrested as he tries to smuggle a few burgers through customs. When he returns, he is proclaimed a National Embarrassment and stripped off his rank. He returns to his home, to his old friend "Ze Inzernet" to download some ringtones, when he notices something in a picture of himself at the airport. He immediately calls his sidekick to infiltrate the Presidential Palace and solve the case! Chief Inspector Dreyfus makes his move and arrests the wrong person, while Clouseau arrives just in time to prevent the 3rd murder and apprehends the true murderer, instantly becoming a National Hero.

          

Steve Martin has outdone himself in this remake with his supreme comic timing and Jean Reno rarely fails to deliver. With such a splendid cast and sublime execution, it is hard to imagine why the movie received such bad reviews. Perhaps it is the curse of the remake or perhaps I am wrong. But one thing is for sure, the movie will leave you grinning be it the first time you watch it or the hundredth. And if Clouseau was right about the gentle healing power of laughter, then I believe we have found here the cure for cancer!

Because Justice is Justice and France is France !

In Space, No One Can Hear You Scream

Title: Gravity

Director: Alfonso Cuarón
Cast: Sandra Bullock, George Clooney
Running Time: 90 minutes
Trailer:

SPOILER ALERT: This review contains material crucial to the plot of the movie.

Space - the vast, empty void where your revolutionary ideas and cinematic ambitions are merely insignificant specks of dust. Such may be said of Gravity by die-hard Star Trek fanboys who were terribly misled by its sci-fi label, thinking it to be an account of an interstellar voyage of epic proportions. To call it a blend of suspense and drama entangled with a lot of visual treats and pure cosmic awesomeness would be more apt. Apart from its rather mocking view of the laws of physics and the human mind, it's a great film to catch on the big screen.

Yes,yes, I used to work in a hospital, but now I sort out technical glitches under zero gravity.

The movie follows the series of unfortunate satellite explosions that lead to the well-portrayed and seemingly overqualified Dr. Ryan Stone (Sandra Bullock) being deserted by a bunch of cold, floating corpses that were once her crew mates aboard the space shuttle Explorer, and how she makes it back into Mother Earth's caring arms after inhumanly abusing her repeatedly ragdolled, oxygen-deprived body and suffering countless pangs of hopelessness and despair at the hands of cruel fate and fossil fuel depletion. As stated earlier, the film is a feast for the eyes, and one cannot help but gape at the ever-present Earth, in all her exaggerated, computer-generated beauty, as she bathes in the light of the sun and drowns in the shadows of its absence, illuminated only by lights from numerous cities. The scene which has Dr. Stone and Commander Matt Kowalski (George Clooney) slowly drifting towards the International Space Station serves to provide a reasonable amount of character depth through dialogue, and provides a vague sense of attachment to the protagonists – the hardship afflicted, warm-hearted doctor and the uncompromising, duty-driven commander, both very well portrayed by brilliant actors. The several tense, fast-paced escape/forced entry sequences, which strongly emphasize on holding on, in both the metaphorical and the literal sense, are very well made, keeping viewers at the edge of their seats throughout. The sound effects also help to make the movie quite the immersive experience, especially Dr. Stone's panicky breathing. Gravity certainly lives up to its expectations on the thriller front. Most importantly, it makes you feel involved till the very end.

I said 5% O2 left. Do I really have to keep talking to you?

There isn't much to be said about the negatives surrounding this film. One scene in particular which did provoke a facepalm was the rather convenient intervention of Dr. Stone's conscience, in the form of her commander's ghost, during her slow, painless suicide attempt resulting from several failed shots at salvation, which elicits a change of heart quicker than the speed of light, convincing her to live on to tell the tale of she who can tell herself not to kill herself when she wants to kill herself. Apart from this and several minor mechanical inaccuracies, which are not very relevant considering it's a movie, there's nothing bad to be said about the film. In my opinion, however, it is certainly not close to the "masterpiece" everyone deems it to be.
 

You and I, above this beautiful world, No one cares if we die, above this beautiful world

Gravity is one hell of a thriller, and must be seen in theaters, preferably in IMAX 3D, in order to thoroughly savor all that's been served. Taking the survivalist genre to new frontiers, Alfonso Cuarón has done a fabulous job as director. Gravity is an assured one and a half hours of pure entertainment.

Reviewer's Rating: 3.5/5

 

Elysium (2013)

Director     : Neill Blomkamp
Screenplay : Neill Blomkamp
Running Time : 109 minutes
Cast : Matt Damon, Jodie Foster, Sharlto Copley, Alice Braga, William Fichtner.
Budget : $115 Million

“Diseased, overpopulated, ruined”.

Welcome to Earth - 2154, the opening scene of Elysium, Neill Blomkamp's latest science-fiction thriller. Elysium is a man-made utopia orbiting around Earth, 'created by the super rich to preserve their way of life', according to the movie. The citizens of Elysium live in bliss, completely ignorant of the happenings on Earth, which has degenerated to a state of Malthusian disarray.

The movie lets you explore an interesting world with lots of thrilling action pieces. The design and technology of everything in Elysium  manages to balance between reality and futuristic cool stuff. The director has incorporated some stunning special effects that go along with the tone of the movie. The cinematography was simply superb and we appreciate the attention to detail in many aspects of the surrealistic world.

The protagonist Matt Damon plays a disgruntled citizen of Earth, Max, who has been obsessed with the idea of reaching Elysium since childhood. However, faced with the harsh reality that getting to Elysium (or rather, getting citizenship of Elysium) is next to impossible, he indulges in crime and later tries to reform himself. Forced into a life-or-death situation and into a perilous condition, he realizes he has a far higher purpose to fulfill than simply bringing his own desires to fruition.


Jodie Foster superbly plays the part of Delacourt, the ruthless, steely, corrupt, and power-hungry Secretary of Defense of Elysium(watch out for her accent!). This is in stark contrast to her role in Silence of the Lambs, where she is docile and at mercy to the whims of Hannibal Lecter. It is a tribute to her acting that she is able to pull off both roles with ease. The awesome William Fichtner (The Dark Knight, Alex Mahone of Prison Break) convincingly takes the role of her emotionless and equally ruthless co-conspirator.

The engaging Sharlto Copley (District 9, Murdock  of The A Team) also deserves mention for pulling off a villainous role with ease , acting as Kruger an earth-based agent of Elysium.

Society is split into the “haves” and the “have-nots”, and self-preservation takes precedence over any sense of civic sensibility. Each of the main characters is corrupt in one way or another, including the protagonist, providing a refreshing break from the archetypal heroes we’ve been exposed to recently in cinema halls. Matt Damon’s slow progression from a man interested only in keeping his own life to one who is ready to sacrifice it, makes the plot line almost a “reverse tragedy”, so to speak. After watching the movie, we felt that Alice Braga was not the only thing common between this movie and  Will Smith’s I am Legend.

Several things set this sci-fi apart. For one thing, the movie seems to be a political commentary on the world today. Delacourt seems uncannily like Angela Merkel: both are “iron ladies” chiefly interested in preserving their own state's way of life and prosperity. Los Angeles has become a ghetto where Spanish and English are interchangeably spoken. Latinos and Africans trying to overthrow the whites and gain control. Yes, we get the point Mr.Neill!

Bizarre observations :
For a movie set 100 years in the future, the Earth computers were ancient and basic - Running on DOS!
Also, the president of Elysium is an Indian(funnily named Patel).

Ultimately, the movie presents provokes thought about questions that are relevant in today’s time. Can altruism be justified in a world running out of resources? If protecting your own way of life involves killing others, is it right to do so?

Well, if you are one of those who just wants some good action and killer acting with your popcorn and coke, this movie does just fine.

Rating : 7/10

This One Glides Sublimely Over the Chicane

Director: Ron Howard
Screenplay: Peter Morgan

Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Daniel Brühl, Olivia Wilde, Alexandra Maria Lara, Pierfrancesco Favino

Music: Hans Zimmer
Running time: 122 minutes

1976. It was an age before strict safety standards, press room decorum and radio transmissions with the team. It was the era of the monstrous V-12 engines, uncountable overtakes, flimsy unstable cars, a Ferrari pit crew in striking yellow, and a nightlife that would make Hugh Hefner jealous. It was also the year that will go down as the most exhilarating, the most unpredictable and the most dramatic of all Formula One seasons, thanks to the legendary rivalry between Brit James Hunt and the Austrian Niki Lauda. And Ron Howard’s makes it all come alive in the sleek, finely crafted sports drama Rush.

Without spilling too much beans, the 1976 F1 season is ingrained in popular motorsport folklore for the bitter, fierce and tumultuous feud between Hunt and Lauda – both on and off the track; and it also saw one of the most amazing comebacks in the history of competitive sports. Going into the German Grand Prix at the then notorious Nürburgring circuit, Lauda, driving a Ferrari, had had a clear advantage over Hunt, who had been having a disastrous season up till then courtesy a very unreliable McLaren. Driving in precarious weather, in a race that would later go on to define his career, Lauda crashed his car and suffered burns that threatened to end his racing career, if not his life. His absence from the track helped Hunt gain in on invaluable points and bridge the gap in the Championship Standings. About a month later, however, against the advice of all his doctors, the phoenix of Lauda – quite literally – rose from the ashes to compete in the last four races of the season amidst universal shock and admiration and tremendous amount of pain.

But what makes this rivalry one for the ages isn’t just the battles in their respective cars, but the polar opposite personalities of the two men. Hunt – British wit notwithstanding – was the quintessential F1 playboy, living each day as if it were his last, with a hedonic lifestyle involving a lot of women (including a short-lived marriage), drugs and alcohol, and always drove an aggressive passionate and often reckless race. Lauda on the other hand was a level-headed tactician, an Alain Prost of that age.

And does Ron Howard capture all this in a movie spanning less than two hours? Bloody hell, he does!

After mediocre outings like The Da Vinci Code and Angels and Demons, Howard shows the skill seen in earlier films such as Apollo 13, A Beautiful Mind and Cinderella Man. The race sequences are adrenaline-filled, edge-of-the-seat affairs and yet keep you invested in the characters in a way no no-brainer action flick can do. You get more than a glimpse into the steely, stolid mind as the face disappears behind the visor as the drivers put on their helmets. Never once getting histrionic, there is enough drama to differentiate it from an insipid made-for-TV biopic, and I for one was engrossed as if it were all a real race being played out live before me. More importantly, the film manages to capture the evanescent nature of the whole sport; how it’s all so uncertain; how so much of it depends on luck. 

Peter Morgan (of The Queen, The Last King of Scotland and Frost/Nixon fame) crafts a screenplay that is engaging and well-paced, and never once does the movie seem prosaic or uninspired. The Hans Zimmer score, unsurprisingly, does not disappoint. The two leads cap off fine performances, with Chris Hemsworth stepping out of the pretty hammer wielding god image and effortlessly becoming the roguish, witty and likeable – and sometimes disturbed – Hunt, complete with a surprisingly good British accent (Hemsworth is Australian) and a mischievous twinkle in the eye to go along. The German actor Daniel Brühl (you might remember him as the German war-hero turned film star Frederik Zoller from Inglourious Basterds) is perfect foil as Lauda, with the characteristic level-headed obstinacy and no-nonsense speech that epitomizes the Austrian driver. The most memorable moments of the film are those where both actors share the screen and exchange nasty pleasantries.

Lauda (angrily, after their first race against each in Formula 3): Hey, what’s your name?
Hunt: It’s James Hunt. It rhymes with c***. And that’s what you are.

As a movie on Formula 1, Rush gets almost as good as the sublime Asif Kapadia documentary Senna. The vintage cars, the driver’s eye view of race sequences as the cars whiz past chicanes, and the glimpses into the lives of two antitheses of racers – both united in their drive to win, are all welded masterfully to present a smasher of a film. All in all, Rush is a well-made biographical action-drama, which ranks with The Damned United and even Chariots of Fire as far as sport dramas go, which never gets cloy or pretentious (like Remember the Titans), rusty, dry or brainless, and has more than enough poignancy, soul and mind, amalgamated with the right amount dry humour, to stay with you for quite some time.

Rush is worth every rupee and even more.

Rating: 8.5/10

PS. If any of you snicker at Niki Lauda's surname (as did many in the theater I went to), I curse that your mind doesn't mature beyond where it is right now.