Logic waalo, Tumhari Aisi ki Taisi

Title - Dhoom: 3
Direction and Screenplay - Vijay Krishna Acharya
Producer and Story - Aditya Chopra
Starring - Abhishek Bachchan ("Dhoom is my film and I am the hero"), Aamir Khan, Katrina Kaif, Uday Chopra, Katrina Kaif, Jackie Shroff, Siddharth Nigam
Music - Pritam
Released on - 20 December 2013

Note: Read this review only if you have contributed to the box office record smashing run that Dhoom 3 is on. Or if you do not care about the story.

The film begins in the year 1990 with Iqbal Khan (Jackie Shroff) welcoming you and the bankers whose loan he is defaulting on, to a special show of the Great Indian Circus - home to a never-before-seen magic trick. This magic trick has in fact had an entire movie dedicated to it previously.

An apathetic Mr. Andersen who helms the Western Bank of Chicago rejects Khan's plea to let his show continue and decides to shut the theatre down due to its insolvency. Crestfallen, Khan shoots himself leaving his son Sahir (debutant kiddo Siddharth Nigam) to fend for himself.

Years later, Sahir (now Aamir Khan) has made it his life's driving purpose to ruin the bank that drove his father to suicide by simply doing their job. Like several of his brothers in the hip-hop industry, Sahir makes money rain from the sky and runs down the bank in ultra slow motion with a strange horny expression on his face. He then proceeds to ride his impeccably engineered and well advertised BMW bike, and evades the cops with ease. Having reached the limits of their ability, the Chicago police authorities decide to ring in Supercop Jay (Abhishek Bachchan) and Sidekick Ali (Uday Chopra).

I'm on fire even if my acting career isn't

The first tinge of real emotion that the movie manages to evoke is courtesy Ali's typically comical entry. The feeling of joy however is evanescent as the movie wastes precious time on the improbable task of trying to make Abhishek Bachchan look cool. Ali's monologue to buy himself some time reeks of dialogues that were probably meant to elicit some applause from the director's contorted perception of the Aam Aadmi. When Jai does finally arrive, he does so in all his overacting splendour and performs comical, gravity defying stunts in full Rohit Shetty ishtyle. These scenes illustrate why some things are best left to Salman Khan, although I must admit that Bachchan Jr looks more at home in an auto rickshaw than on a superbike.

The duo are ushered into Chicago by Police Officer Victoria (Tabrett Bethell) who is completely inconsequential to the plot barring her leading role in Ali's erotic fantasies. Soon after, Aaliya (Katrina Kaif) treats us to a titillating 5 minutes of seductive striptease interspersed with some acrobatic dance moves that helps her land the role of Asian Goddess who can sing and dance like water and fire hot trapeze artist in Sahir's circus.

I'm sexy and I know it

The whole sequence involving Supercop Jai taunting Sahir into robbing again and Sahir posing as an informant who would help Jai find his 'Chupchap Charlie' makes both characters seem incredibly naive. Anyway, Sahir robs the bank successfully and gets shot in the ensuing pursuit but manages to escape with assistance from his BMW superbike/speedboat. The only reason I was able to suspend my disbelief through this scene was due to the fact that I had seen Dubai's wonderbus earlier in the day. The same night, Sahir opens The Great Indian Circus - now revamped and larger than ever before as his highlighted by this song that they spent Rs. 5 crore on.

Immediately after the show, Supercop Jai confronts Sahir backstage in an attempt to expose him as the thief but the lack of any sign of a bullet injury on Sahir lets him off the hook much to the chagrin of Jai who is once again in his overacting prime. It is here that the major plot twist of the film is revealed. The person shot was actually Sahir's identical twin Samar whose existence is a secret hidden from the rest of the world. Samar assists Sahir in his stage tricks and bank robberies, loves Aaliya and suffers from the same disease that plagues SRK in My Name is Khan and Hrithik Roshan in Koi Mil Gaya.

The second half of the film, although initially promising fails to deliver and epitomizes the feeling of anti-climax. Simply put, too much of the film is a buildup to nothing. Another song is superfluously introduced to drive home the point that Samar is besotted by Aaliya. Although the chemistry between Samar and Aaliya is anything but sizzling, the two do share a scene that qualifies as almost cute and ends in Aamir entering the elite list of men who get to kiss Katrina Kaif's luscious lips on screen.

The technical work is decent and apart from a few aerial shots of Chicago that seem grainy, the CGI ranks fair compared to foreign films (especially The Amazing SpiderMan 2). Nothing of note can be said about the acting. The ending leaves you feeling shortchanged, especially for an Aamir Khan movie. I was certainly disappointed by the platitudinous script and would rank it several notches below its relatively much classier and more exciting predecessor, especially considering the tremendous hype that the movie had generated prior to its release.

But even as I write this, Dhoom 3 continues to smash box office records and is clearly on its way to becoming the all time leading grosser. Moreover, the response it has received from critics and audiences is mostly positive. So this may still be a film that you would want to watch for yourself and decide.

The title song sung by Adita Sen Sharma (and its Arabic version by Lebanese singer Naya who has a striking resemblance to twerker extraordinaire Miley Cyrus) is as hummable as the previous ones and offers some much needed respite as Katrina Kaif gyrates to it at the end of the film.

Overall verdict on the film: Watch it, curse it, forget it.